Fucken 45% per annum for 3 years, are they insane. As if petrol prices aren’t bad enough, now this as well and lets not forget the Tax man with the black strap-on.

I received an email this morning with a link to the “Official Eskom Petition” and signed as well. Eskom knew a long time ago that the shit was going to hit the fan but they kept on paying kak big bonuses to the “dickrectors”…Oh sorry, I mean “Directors. The government is spending millions on stadiums and generators for those stadiums. Mr. Government, how about you gooi some money Eskom’s way… Oh wait I forgot, you don’ give flying fuck as long as you’re sorted all is well.

Furthermore Eskom knows it’s the only provider of electricity and thus they know they can fuck us around. And then of course you get the Eskom representatives on TV saying “We unfortunately regret this decision” bla bla fucken bla, you knew the shit was coming. My question is; Why didn’t’ you brainless dick heads not do something about it years ago when it wasn’t so bad?

Anyway, go and sign the petition and let’s see what happens.

Here is something I came across on witness.co.za.

Tags: Electricity Rated, Eskom, Eskom Petition

I’m not a Hip-Hop fan at all, but this was dam funny to me. You might understand if you’re afrikaans as the language is pretty close.

Tags: Boks OWE, Brainpower, Youtube

Travel sites like the trip advisor and similar can be hugely damaging to any business and gives customers a platform where they can really go all out to poison reputations and destroy businesses completely. While honest feedback is always appreciated, especially constructive responses that aid any industry in their on going training, maintenance, product sourcing and general “up keep” of the business in their effort to exceed customer satisfaction, most times vidictive remarks and comments left on trip advisor is a direct result of a customer who “didn’t get his own way”. There are many ways to sort out a problem and going directly to management level or above, problems are almost always resolved so those people addicted to trip advisor, in my opinion, should put their talents to some constructive use and perhaps start writing articles to keep their grubby little paws busy.

The feedback on TripAdvisor are of great distress to many a small business who, if not 100% accommodating to customes with regards to discounts and free bees are constantly threatened and basically black mailed that the customer will use trip advisor and similar sites to damage them. It is such a shame that so few people take the time to write about their good experiences. If industrys, especially resorts and hotels, could put everything that is said about them in their guest comment book at their reception desks, on TripAdvisor, they would then score TOP MARKS, but that will be unethical and seen as “self marketing”. Travel sites like TripAdvisor can be very damaging, as the statistics for any service industry shows; only 1 out of 10 customers will pass on their positive feedback, where if they had a bad experience, 8 out of 10 will tell about 10 people and so the circle of destruction starts nevermind those who get their family and friends to join them on their disaster campaign. In one case that we studied, regardless of the negative comments on trip advisor, the resort was still no 8 of the Top Hotels on Zanzibar… In the case where a site like TripAdvisor with 8 million members, it could be devastating for any business. Off course if the customer is paying for a service, their expectation is to receive good service / enjoy a good product and for any serious business, the aim should be to exceed that expectation. An interesting question came up: What if the guest was under the wrong impression and the wrong expectation was created even before they have set foot on the resorts premises?  This is exactly what happened with one guest that wrote negative feedback of the 30th of September about Mtoni Marine resort in Zanzibar. They were sold a 4 star hotel. Anyone living on Zanzibar would tell you that it is very difficult if not impossible to put a star rating to any hotel there. As a South African with many friends in Zanzibar, I can tell you that if I was sold a room in a 4 star hotel and I arrived at Mtoni Marine resort, I would be very disappointed. But….it wouldn’t be the resorts fault….it would be the fault of the person who sold it to me and in order to close the deal, painted a four star picture.

As stated in all of Mtoni resorts marketing material they are “as laid back as home”, they are a family friendly resort, they are the only private beach outside of Stone Town. They do not have TV’s in the rooms, they do not have mini-bars, they do not have room service and they do not have telephones in the rooms. All items that would be associated with a 4 star hotel. They are what they are and they would never apologise for that. BUT….. if a tour operator sells Mtoni to an agent here in South Africa who then sells it to a client and everyone is making money in the process, by the time the client has paid, they have a certain expectation. Mtoni Marine cannot meet that expectation if everyone has added a mark-up to the original price and in most cases a huge mark-up. Mtoni are most certainly not a 4 star hotel, but it is a  beautiful resort with all the special touches that makes them unique and have many a regular guest returning year after year. But nevertheless, if sold as a four star in South Africa (or anywhere in the world) and customer is disappointed after arrival, who is actually to blame here?  Then….. someone goes onto the trip advisor and writes the biggest load of bull but omits to tell the world that he arrived at the resort with a very different expectation and he doesn’t tell the world that his favourite travel agency in South Africa sold the resort to him as a four star resort.  Oh no….that part is left out and the world is left to think that Mtoni is the shittiest resort on the island.

I could write pages and pages on small businesses who have been wrongfully damaged by defiant, rude, obnoxious clients or customers and I could get justification from the businesses for all comments left on the trip advisor, but what I can’t do, is explain some human beings attitudes. There are (unfortunately) just some people that you can’t keep happy…..ever!!!  If these kind of people choose to spend their entire stay at the resort or hotel not talking to each other and just shouting at staff or beating one another up…..exceeding guests expectations is very difficult.  Perhaps all of the trip advisor viewers, trying to make up your mind about a particular hotel, resort, service…and you’re looking at the trip advisor for the answers…it might be a great idea to read between the lines before allowing the comments to change your mind on the hotel or resort that you had in mind from the beginning.

sent anonymously via email

Tags: Mtoni, resort, Trip Advisor, Zanzibar

This post goes against every musical bone in my body, BUT… It’s for a good couse. Port Elizabeth does not see many international music artist and personally I think it would be great to see more of them do shows in PE.

A lovely young lady Brittany badly wants the Jonas Brothers to come and perform in Port Elizabeth, sadly not many other Port Elizabethans seem to be interested. I thought to help out and spread the word about her Petition that she started up to get the Jonas Brothers to come and perform in Port Elizabeth.

So if you live in Port Elizabeth and you are a fan get your ass over there and sign the Jonas Brothers Petition.

Tags: Jonas Brothers, Port Elizabeth

Now before we start looking at the similarities let’s look at what .htaccess and 500 internal server errors are.

.htaccess

In several web servers (most commonly Apache), .htaccess (hypertext access) is the default name of a directory-level configuration file that allows for decentralized management of web server configuration. The .htaccess file is placed inside the web tree, and is able to override a subset of the server’s global configuration; the extent of this subset is defined by the web server administrator. The original purpose of .htaccess was to allow per-directory access control (e.g. requiring a password to access the content), hence the name. Nowadays .htaccess can override many other configuration settings, mostly related to content control, e.g. content type and character set, CGI handlers, etc.

500 Internal Server errors

The 500 Internal Server Error is a very general HTTP status code that means something has gone wrong on the web site’s server but the server could not be more specific on what the exact problem is.

In other words it has absolutely no idée what hell went wrong.

And now the similarities.

A .htaccess file can be confusing at the best of times, you never understand them and they like screwing you around.

The one moment she is “aaaww honey, I love you. The next thing you know she is throwing the vase you gave her at you because her body decided to climb on to it menstrual cycle and run your ass over.

This is the same with .htaccess, one moment everything is fine but if something changes and it doesn’t like it, it moons you and says “Try again asshole”

A 500 error means absolutely jack. It doesn’t tell what the problem is and leaves you hanging till you figure it out.

Now gents you will know what I’m talking about here. Sometimes you and your lady will get into an argument and just to make sure she gets the last word in she goes and uses the word fine. Now ladies the word “fine” in most cases means jack shit to a man.

The word fine can mean anything, just as a 500 internal server error can mean anything.

Now please don’t get me wrong, I love women and at the end of the day we are all human.

Tags: .htaccess, 500 internal server error, women

Now being a guy…Of course it is, but what I mean is it an important factor in a relationship and marriage. Studies say yes..and I agree. I’ve studied allot of psychology and human sexual behavior and it seems that it plays a very important role indeed. But some people seem to be battling a bit. “Aaa come on baby” and she replies “No I’ve got a headache… Bull fucken shit. It could be that he isn’t doing it right, or maybe mr willy is to quick on the draw, who knows, or maybe she isn’t doing it right and that’s because he’s still watching TV. Whatever the case, wake the fuck up and wok on it.

Anyway..here is something else you can go and read on the subject: Sex – The answer to a lasting marriage.

That’s it from now… on the next rant it’s me and the SA Government

Tags: marriage, sex

Right, it may be time to get that old oval shaped tub out that ouma used way back in the 1920’s. On Saturday 26 September myself and a couple friends were at the Lourie Festival also known as the Naartjie Fees. We watched our mate Robert Gilmar do his show and then walked around for a bit, after which we took a trip to the Lourie Dam where we were quite stunned as to how far the levels have droppod.

As a result of this the Nelson Mandela Bay Municipality will be enforcing water restrictions as of mid October and stated that if the Eastern Cape does not get it’s needed rain fall in the catchment areas in October and November, we have only enough water in our dams for one year.

Dam Levels as at 28 September 2009:

• Kouga – 56,3%
• Churchill – 35,3%
• Impofu – 60,5%
• Loerie – 34,0%
• Groendal – 56,0%
• Average level of all dams – 54,8 %  of total combined capacity.

Tags: Eastern Cape, Port Elizabeth, rain, Water restrictions

I am a bit behind on this one, I believe this was churned out on  2nd September 2009. Never the less I have to say something. KISS MY LILLY WHITE ASS! Ok, on a more serious note though, are they serious. I can understand the whole smoking inside thing, it gets cought up, eys burn, sinuses go bonkers and babies die, I understand that. But now I can’t smoke outside! Nee man!

Anyway, here are the new flaws…I mean Laws.

• It is now illegal for adults to smoke in a car where there is a child under 12 years of age.
• Fines up to a maximum of R50,000 will be handed to owners of a restaurant, pub, bar or workplace who breach the smoking laws and R500 for the individual smoker.
• Smoking is now illegal in “partially enclosed” public places such as covered patios, verandas, balconies, walkways and parking areas.
• Smoking is not permitted on premises, including private homes, used for commercial childcare activities, or for schooling or tutoring.
• The tobacco industry is no longer permitted to hold “parties” or use “viral” marketing to target young people.
• The sale of tobacco products to and by people under 18 years is prohibited, as is the sale of confectionery or toys resembling tobacco products.
• Also in the pipeline are rules to keep smoking away from entrances to buildings, and restrict it in sports stadiums, railway platforms, bus stops as well as outdoor dining areas.

Now even though I do plan on gutting down on my smoking, the new laws will still not stop me from smoking. These assholes are tightening the laws on smoking, how about consentrating on more urgent matters like the economy and crime that fucks more people up then smoking.

Well let me start off by saying that is a pretty fucked up title…no wait, nice title for a story that most will probably say is pretty a “fucked up title. And let me say further more that some of you are probably going say “what a dick”…I say “whatever blows smoke up your ass.”

This is about a town or city… called Port Elizabeth and my…kind of love hate relationship with it. In some ways I like it, some really interesting people and things can be found here, but at the same time some really fucked up people and things can be found as well. “What is this asshole blabbering about “ I here you ask? Well let start with what I see most of the time… The bad, ugly and not even worth labeling “fucked up”.

Let’s start with a little place called Balizza, or as I like to call it “Glitter ball Palace” with a lot of people that have no personality. “You dick”…well it’s true, just go there one night and look… really look. Some of the people that go there have no fucken personality, none. What you may see though is some guy with a pink shirt and 2 sizes to small tight jeans with so much jell in his hair that he could actually be deemed a fire hazard. It gets better though, you might also see a girl with a “don’t leave much for the imagination” skirt on that shines so much you could put her on your bonnet and use her for headlite replacements. And both the guy and the girl most likely are just trying to attract enough attention so that they can have a mindless fuck at some point during the night.

When did people start becoming so fucken stupid, where did the intelligent conversation go? “You’re a dry dick head, get with the times” has been said to me a couple of times, “Fuck you, you brainless little shit, go read a book and jack up your vocabulary before you try and insult me” I mean “get with the times” what the hell does that even mean.

Not too long ago I was at Pool City in Walmer. I was on my second whisky when really beautiful woman sat down across from me. Politely she asked if she could join me and I replied “Sure”. We started talking and I thought to myself “Thank God, someone with a brain”. About two or three hours later she leaned forward and asked “my place or yours”.

Now let’s just stop there for a second. Easy doesn’t do it for me, in fact easy (for me at least) equals traffic, and probably lots of it. Now for those who do not get what I’m saying. Use your God given gift called a brain and fucken think for a second.

I thought about this for a second and replied “How about I drop you off at a corner of your choice” Naturally she did not take kindly to my reply and just said “asshole” I expected a bit more insulting to be honest. Now this brings me to my point, where did it all go so wrong? Why do some people make themselves cheap. Don’t think for a second that guys are off the hook here, we are just as bad… maybe even worse. I say we because I tried playing the same game once, but quickly came to the realization that it is only going to make me incredibly stupid.

Look I’m not saying that Port Elizabeth is a bad place, on the contrary, it’s a great town, it’s just that some of the poeple living here could use a bit more charecture and think a bit more. I’m also not saying that there is something wrong with one nighters, but don’t fucken force it, just let it happen.

I’ll ramble on at another time, work a-waits.

Tags: Port Elizabeth